Image courtesy of mrhappy8

Out of all of the five questions: who, what, where, when, how and why; why is the most important question. Why you ask? Good question. Why is the fundamental question. Like a building that will not be stable without first having a secure and solid foundation, your ability to live a fulfilling life also rests on having a solid basis of "why". Why provides the purpose, the reason, the meaning, the focus and the clarity. It also provides the framework. It completes the picture. It is the first thing that must be answered, "what is my purpose?" It is also the last thing that must be questioned, "did I fulfill my purpose?" Paradoxically, like all of life it is the beginning and the end at the same time. Why is the first question you must ask before doing anything in your life, be it something as trivial as eating a candy bar to something as major as changing your career path.

Why provides a foundation

Lets take a closer look at this. Imagine a building is built without first providing a secure foundation. What do you think will happen to this building? Well, the building may function fine - but how long will it last? How strong will it stand up against outside forces such as an earth-quake, hurricane or tornado? How stable will it be? How safe and secure will you feel in this building? Now think about the bigger picture of your life. Have you ever asked yourself why? Why are you alive? Why are you here in this world? Answering this question of why, will give you a secure and stable foundation for which to build your "life". For without purpose you have no direction. Without direction you are lost. If you are lost, you are confused. Confusion can then lead to all sorts of negative and harmful feelings such as anger, doubt, fear, resentment and unhappiness. Do you currently have any of these feelings? If you trace these feelings back and ask yourself why, then you will probably see that they are because of a lack of purpose. You haven't answered why.

If you teach a man to fish...

You have probably all heard the phrase, "If you give a man a fish, you will feed him for a day. But if you teach a man HOW to fish, you will feed him for the rest of his life." It is a very good quote. But not the best example of how to best help somebody in need. What happens if you only teach this man how to catch catfish and there are only salmon in the river? What happens if you are so good at teaching him how to fish, he catches all the fish and there are no more left? Well, the man would most likely starve. You see nothing is impermanent. A good teacher teaches a man how to teach himself. A teacher cannot account for all the unknowns and variables that may occur in a given situation. He/she must provide the insight, often in the form of inspiration for his/her pupil to be able to adapt to whatever circumstances comes their way. At this level, the pupil begins to "create" his own teachings. Here's my version of this quote, which I find more empowering:

You see, if a person understands why he must do something then all the other questions fall into place, the how, where, when and who. This man will never starve, and he will be able to adapt to whatever changes may occur. And then even when all the fish run out, he will learn for himself how to eat off the land.

The Why Exercise

Too often we focus on the how. You can clearly see this in all the self-help books that teach you HOW to. How to live a better life. HOW to be rich. HOW to be successful. HOW to be happy. Instead I urge you to ask WHY? Why should you have a better life? Why should you be rich? Why should you be successful? Why should you be happy? On the surface these may appear to be easy questions to answer, but dig a little deeper and you may be surprised by your answers. How about some tougher questions, why are you working at your current job? Why are you living where you are currently living? Why do you have the friends you currently have? Why do you let your spouse/significant other mistreat you? Why do Hawaiins love spam so much?

The why exercise is a technique that will help you to reach your fundamental purpose. For every answer you get to a why question, continue asking yourself why. If you were to break down every answer you come up with and further the line of questioning by asking yourself why to these answers, then you will most likely end up with your purpose.

This is a very powerful tool, I suggest you write down your answers and responses. It will be very revealing, and you will see that many of the things you do, want, desire and need do not make any sense at all. They are all illusions - they are not your choices. You must be very honest with yourself when doing this exercise.

Example: Why do I need to buy this new car? Well, I don't need it, I want it. Why do I want it? So I can show people how successful I am. Why do I need to show people how successful I am? Well I don't, but it makes me feel better about myself. Why do you care what people think about you? Well....you can see how powerful this questioning is.

Here's another example: Why am I working in this job that I hate? So I can take care of my family. Why do I need to take care of my family? Because it is my responsibility. Why is it my responsibiility? Because I chose to marry and have a family. Why did I choose this? So I can share my love. Why do I want to share my love? Because that is what is important in my life, sharing and loving. Why is sharing and loving important in your life? Because my purpose is to share what I have with others and spread love and joy - it is who I AM.

You see how this exercise gives you a deep inisght into your reasons and justifications as to why you are doing the things you do. If you are honest with yourself, you will see what areas in your life you need to adjust, modify, remove or improve.

Increase your awareness

You can incorporate this why questioning into everything you do in life. From the mundane, to the major. Why am I brushing my teeth? Why am I feeling angry? Why do I like it when...? Why do I hate it when...? This will effectively increase your conscious awareness while at the same time sharpen and focus your mind. Practice this and maybe then you can tell me - why do Hawaiins love spam so much?

Note: I love Hawaiins.